The Betrayal of Xbox Fanboys by the Coward Phil Spencer
Or, Forza Horizon 5 is launching on the PlayStation 5
Hell hath no fury like a gamer scorned, and the tyrants at Xbox continue to impose their malignant will on their loyal Green Army. Their latest offense? Announcing Forza Horizon 5, a game which released in 2021, is coming to the PlayStation 5 this spring. Here’s a quick recap of what Xbox chief Phil Spencer has said in the last couple of years regarding platform exclusivity, and some of the more dramatic responses to the news.
Et Tu, Phil?
Betrayal comes in many forms, but none are more egregious than a corporation trying to maximize its profits by publishing one of its most successful properties on a competing platform. Xbox fans are no stranger to abuse from the monolithic corporation from which their entire identities are derived, and today’s news that Forza Horizon 5 will be releasing on the PS5 this spring is no exception.
For anyone who has been paying attention, this news should come as little to no surprise. Spencer himself admitted back in 2023, that Xbox “Lost the console war.” And regarding Xbox developed titles appearing on places other than PC and Xbox Spencer spoke quite candidly while answering a question during Xbox @gamescom 2024
“And we run a business,” Spencer said. “It’s definitely true inside of Microsoft the bar is high for us in terms of the delivery we have to give back to the company. Because we get a level of support from the company that’s just amazing and what we’re able to go do.
“So I look at this, how can we make our games as strong as possible? Our platform continues to grow, on console, on PC, and on cloud. It’s just going to be a strategy that works for us.”
And if that wasn’t definitive enough, speaking to Bloomberg in November of last year, Spencer said:
“I do not see sort of red lines in our portfolio that say ‘thou must not.’”
Though the language being used here is covered in the glossy layers of varnish any executive worth their salt will apply when speaking to the press the message itself seems pretty clear, “We like money, and we aren’t making enough of it just selling games to you chumps.”
So, how did the Xbox fans around the web handle the news? With grace? Did they reply with the understanding that in a world where AAA video game are only getting more expensive to produce sometimes concessions must be made? Are they welcoming the Sony Ponies into the Forza stables with open arms?
Of course not! You fool! You simpleton! You fucking nitwit! You think gamers are capable of being normal about anything?
Well, some of them were, but we aren’t here to see levelheaded responses to a benign announcement about a three year old game coming to another platform.
r/Xbox Responds
These comments were taken from the announcement thread on the Xbox subreddit.
I’m always getting mad when games I love are able to be sold to more people.
This is actually perfect, no notes.
‘Round The Forums
In my quest to see how the Xbox community at large was responding to this betrayal I did a google search for “Xbox forums”, and the second result which came after the official Xbox forums was a site called xboxforums.com, where, as of this writing, not a single post had been made regarding the news. The newest post is about Seagate compatibility, made on January 25th. Clearly all the users are too deep in mourning to log on and register their disgust.
Thankfully, the thread on trueachievements bore more fruit.
Phil Spencer helmed the deal that made Call of Duty and World of Warcraft Xbox properties. Don Mattrick turned the Xbox into TiVo.
Phil, you’re literally throwing stones at your players.
Gamers, rise up!
It’s All Happening on X - The Everything App!
Here are some of the best responses I saw on the website formerly known as Twitter.
As you can see, this clever poster below used Grok to generate an image of an Xbox Series X as a headstone.
I looked at this person’s profile for fifteen minutes and I still can’t decide if this was a serious post or not, either way, I’m making you look at it now.
Edit: It’s been brought to my attention that this is actually a copypasta originally made by a PlayStation fan.
They simply have no business being in the business they’ve been in business with for over 20 years!
More incredible work by Grok.
Agreed, Tiso.
End of The Road
That’s it, Dear Reader. We’ve reached the end of the post and you’re free to go. I do have a few questions though. This is a new venture for me, and I don’t want to waste your or my time on things people don’t enjoy reading.
Was reading this a good use of your time?
Do you enjoy laughing at these poor tortured souls as much as I do?
Would you read similarly formatted posts about things other than video games?
Let me know in the comments, or send an email to mail@culturedumpster.com.